Good Times and Bad

Our testimony meeting was unusually stellar. One young man was brave enough to bear his testimony about escaping addiction with Christ’s help, and I don’t think there was a person in the congregation who wasn’t riveted or crying by the time he sat down. Another young man got up and by the middle of his testimony it was clear that he was either a lapsed member or a non-member, “but I want to do whatever it takes to be part of what you have here,” he said. My brother the elder’s quorum president made a beeline for him at the end of the meeting, as did the bishop.

I used to be a heavy drinker. I am still not sure if I officially qualfied as “alcoholic” or not, but I was at least close to the border line.

I was blessed in that at one point, around April/May 2002, over a short time period, my body lost its ability to process alcohol — one drink would give me a mild hangover. I recognized that fact, and was able to stop drinking without treatment. It’s been 18.5 years.

In the stresses of 2020, I’ve been seriously tempted to visit the liquor store down the street, and have so far resisted. Not wanting to break an 18+ year streak was my main “saving motivation” at one point.

I have been closely associated with at least 3 full-on alcoholics, and at least two opioid addicts. I attempted to minister to them as a friend; one alcoholic and one opioid addict were church-friends.

My conclusion, based on this limited experience, is this: I will never again encourage or assist someone who is in a current state of drunkness or drug-high to attend a church meeting, neither a Sunday meeting nor a fireside nor a FHE.

If they are hung over, yes, I’ll accompany or drive them. But actually in drunkeness or high, no. There is a difference.

It does not help them.

I may visit, and sit with them, and support them, when they are drunk/high, mainly to help assure their safety, and let them know they are not cut off. But being in a formal or semi-formal church meeting does them no good, and has a negative effect on others in attendance.

Any ministering beyond mere presence or hand-holding has to wait until they sober up. They just can’t process/communicate — neither understand, nor express themselves.

I’m not saying their blood alcohol content must be 0%. But if they cross whatever threshhold into inebriation, you just have to wait.

(That came out a bit harsh.)

My experience includes being manipulated from helping to enabling. What gut-wrenching “learning experiences” those were.

So, the degree and types of help is a judgement call on the part of the helper. It is said that boundaries need to be set and enforced.