This Happy Golden Year
We seem to have stumbled into one of those patches of smooth water and sunlit sailing.
We are a very happy family right now. Absit omen, it is very good while it lasts. it is odd to say that we are happier now given the world falling apart around us. But so it is.
Mostly I credit the corona. Turning in on ourselves and cutting out all the outside fuss has been very good for us. We are all calmer and happier and finally have time to enjoy each other. The craziness of the world hasn’t hurt either, its made us more grateful for each other and what we have.
Especially with the older kids, I’m often not having to give orders at all, just suggestions. And when the order does come, it can come gently. They are confident in their ability to do things and are starting to volunteer just because they feel like they contribute. We have had a few people observe us who have been stunned.
What those people don’t realize is all the work it took to get here, and all the work it will probably take in the future. Lots of discipline, lots of parents holding firm against resistance, lots of teaching and instruction, lots of time spent as family talking and listening, lots of patient instruction teaching them to do things, lots of cleaning up the mistakes and encouraging the kids when they thought they’d never make it.
Everything is more relaxed when there are clear lines of authority, when no one is vying for control. But even with the cultural support for authority we receive in the kingdom, it still takes awhile.
Anyhow, we are sometimes reluctant in the Church to talk about the payoffs of our way of life, because we all know that many of us are trying for the payoffs and aren’t getting them. We don’t want to brag or rub salt in wounds. What I think, though, is that we go so far in the opposite direction that the collective impression is that the payoffs don’t exist.
We are grateful while it lasts.
JRL in AZ
July 8, 2020
The payoffs do exist, and they are sublime. And they exist even during our trials. We are having a very similar experience in our family. Because of being locked down, we have had a greater focus on studying and living the gospel together. It has been a very happy period in our life. But the difficulties of life have continued unabated throughout. We have a child that is drifting rather than preparing for a mission. We have another that gives us serious worries about mental health. The point is that those struggles continue, but the happiness is still there. Follow the commandments – they are directions for happiness, and if you follow them, you will reap happiness even in your trials.
Marilyn
July 8, 2020
I feel the same. These are good days for us. Some worries, some heartaches, but so much good.
E.C.
July 8, 2020
Indeed, these past three months have been wonderful for my own family – with the possible exception of my younger brother, who got a summer job welding structural steel. He comes home black as a coal miner every day, saying, “Only — days left!” before he collapses on the floor. Also he got called as elders’ quorum president, after all his plans for an international internship fell through. He tries so hard to escape responsibility, but it comes looking for him, and he’s too faithful to actually be irresponsible. 🙂
But we’ve spent more time with my siblings’ families than we have in pretty much ever, and since we generally get along well anyway, it’s been a golden summer so far. Also we just found out that some old family friends (who are basically family) are moving back close soon, so this is shaping up to be an awesome year.
I notice that most drama disappears when there’s a clear line of authority to follow.
Evenstar
July 8, 2020
Despite the fact that I haven’t had certain blessings in my life, I make it a point to be happy for other people in their blessings. So, G, I’m glad you have a happy life, that you and your wife love each other and all your children. I would love to see such happiness everywhere.
G.
July 9, 2020
Noble. Sort of a variant on the nameless virtue. The opposite of sour grapes.