Exhibit A.

PETA sues for freedom of killer whales held in involuntary servitude.

No doubt I’ll soon be arrested for traffic in sexual slavery: I have two female dachshunds I keep in a kennel when I’m out going to and fro in the Galaxy, and up and down in it (involuntary servitude), and when I get home, I rub their bellies (doubtless some kind of sex offense.) Of course, the dogs show every sign of loving me and enjoying the belly rubs, but that’s just Stockholm syndrome.

His Majesty: “I’ve met your curs. They needed enslaving.”