Mah stake president gave a talkin’ to our gennulmen youngun’s not too long ago on preparin’ fer mishinary service. Durned if he din’t give them fellers some well-placed expostulations:
- Sittin’ on yer Francis all the live-long day pushin’ knobs on an electronical gadget ain’t perzactly the best way to tone up for strenyoous mishinary service.
- The natchural knack fer pickin’ up furrin talk dies out by age 18, so it behoofivies you to already have some practice at it, just in case you end up shippin’ out to some exotical place where they don’t speak Utahan, like China or New York City.
- You kin’t preach what you ain’t believin’ yer ownself. So familiarate yerself now with the Holy Word, and take out yer soul now and then fer a good inspectin’.
- You might perchance not wish to be in too great a rush. Goin’ at 18 ain’t carved in stone. You kin wait ’til 19 if need be. In fact, sez the stake president, I may be insistin’ on it for some of you young’uns.
- On a belated note, you need to grow a thick enough hide to handle a good snort of rejecshun.
That last one is the first partway decent argyment I’ve ever heered for young bucks to be doin’ any datin’.