Junior Ganymede
We endeavor to give satisfaction

I have no plans to see “Avatar.”

January 07th, 2010 by Vader

It does not help that the Na’vi have been compared with Ewoks.

Ironically, the destruction of the second Death Star was an environmental catastrophe.

Comments (10)
Filed under: Brilliantly Lit | Tags: ,
January 07th, 2010 14:55:00
10 comments

Bruce Nielson
January 7, 2010

Never thought I’d see the day that the dark lord ran in fear like a little Na’vi girl-ling. All that heavy breathing and fancy armor can’t protect the coward within, now can it? ;)


Vader
January 7, 2010

[Covers ears] I can’t hear you! Na na naah na-na-naah na-na-naaaah …


Bruce Nielson
January 8, 2010

Ewoks! Ewoks!

Face it, Dark Lord! A bunch of little fuzzy creatures that looked like bad puppets totally kicked your trash!

Ewoks! Ewoks! Ewoks!

*breaks into the ‘Chub Chub’ victory song with hat in hand*


Vader
January 8, 2010

Well, they were no ordinary teddy bears. They were the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered ursines you ever set eyes on.


Bruce Nielson
January 8, 2010

Dude! They were just bad puppets! Fry crying out loud your entire Empire fell due to some of the worst Jim Henson Muppets ever made!

Heck, I’ll bet if you handed any old Muppet a lightsaber, he could probably beat either Dark Lord with a bum leg and one hand tied behind his back!

Granted, he’ll choose to go into hiding afterwards for no apparent reason other than to allow the original trilogy to take place… but still… you guys seems to have a real Muppet problem on your hands. It’s like you cower in fear the moment Muppets come on the screen.


Rameumptom
January 8, 2010

My wife’s cousin, Karen, played on of the Ewoks in the movie. She said that Vader looked really lame in that black getup. She said it was like the old cowboy stereotype thing.
Oh, and if you think destroying the second Death Star was bad for the environment, how do you think the fully functional Death Star was on the environment at Alderaan?


Rameumptom
January 8, 2010

BTW, the ewoks were not muppets, but played by real people: little people.


Vader
January 8, 2010

Dude! Palpatine defeated Yoda fair and square. No cowering involved.

“… So I threw the whole Senate at him! True story!”

As for the Ewoks, it is they who would have cowered in fear, had I not been preoccupied elsewhere. Even a Sith Lord can’t be everywhere at once.


Bruce Nielson
January 8, 2010

You can run from the muppets, but you can’t hide, Lord Vader. They have your number!

Oh, look over there, is that Kermit the Frog? Ha ha ha, scared ya!


Vader
January 8, 2010

Rameumpton,

It was all Tarkin’s fault. The man was insane.

Bruce,

You really think I have any reason to fear Muppets? Three words: Pigs In Space.

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